Feeling self-conscious? Doubting your value? It may be time to throw yourself a party.

I have been celebrating my birthday over the past couple of weeks. I attended intimate dinners and cocktail events that I arranged in my honor in Chicago, New York, Atlanta and Los Angeles. As I made my way across the country, each night I would walk into a room filled with people I love. In turn, the next day I came to my meetings happily in service.

Injecting more love into your life is essential to your success. That’s because closing deals and building relationships is no longer about selling, it’s about serving. We serve others when we bring love into the room – when we compassionately listen to their challenges and provide tailor-made solutions. This naturally happens when you leave your problems and ego at the door and operate with principled intention.

Getting to that self-assured place can be difficult — especially if you feel the weight of personal issues or you’re caught up in a drama at work. To set all that aside and arrive from an authentic place of service, you have to know three things: 1) who you are, 2) the value that you bring to the table, and 3) how much you are loved.

After writing Make A Name For Yourself, my first book on personal branding, I was clear on who I was and what I brought to the table. However, as the years went on I felt less solid on the love part. Recognizing this, I decided to surround myself with people that I adore. My “birthday tour” did the trick to make me feel loved, grateful and truly happy.

How can you possibly be in service to others if you don’t take care of yourself and ask for what you need?

Ultimately, people buy from people they love. How can you ever expect someone to promote you, partner with you, even listen to what you have to say if you doubt yourself or feel that you are not enough?

Successful brands celebrate their stand out qualities and thrive on the loyalty they receive from their customers. Your personal brand requires no less of you than loyalty and a heartfelt celebration of your essence, all that you stand for and all that you deliver. Bottom line — if you’re sold on you then you will authentically communicate with passion and bring big love to everything you do.

Everyone needs an anchor in rough seas. Make a list of your favorite people and throw a party that reminds you how much you are loved.